Dinner, math, and relationship

I was recently out to dinner at a moderately nice restaurant. I was seated at close proximity to a couple that were obviously on a first date. We were so close, it was impossible to not hear the conversation, as much as I tried not to....okay, so I tried not to AT FIRST.
After a while, it was interesting....the speculation.

I suppose the writer in me wants to know how it's going to 'turn out'.
He, the khaki clad corporate guy with a scruffy beard trying to brag about his investments and his camping/fishing hobby.
She, the pretty blonde with an edgy, almost gruff voice trying to sell him on how great it was when she was decades younger, driving a motorcycle and being in the military. As she continued to talk about herself, it seemed she was intentionally sabotaging the date.....making her life sound like she had just walked off the set of Jerry Springer.

Obviously, they were both a bit out of their element.....she probably seeking stability and he wanting to try something a bit wilder.
She spent much of the rest of the meal looking bored. I could feel their awkward silences at my table....so awkward that I struck up a ridiculous conversation with my waitress just to give them something to hear other than the shuffling of their meals on their plates.

Yeah, I don't think it was really going to work out for them.
Or maybe they'll give it a go and try to be different and realize...nah...bad idea....OR not? Good idea? Different enough from what they've known to want to make things work?
Who knows. Maybe they view awkward silence as foreplay (for what's it worth, I do not.)

The real question in my mind: how does it work out for anyone?
I guess I have not yet discovered my magical equation that defines the acceptable relationship parameters around 'different' and 'same'.
The struggle for me is that it's not a finite point. Some days, all I want is different.....I want the discovery, the newness, the excitement and challenge of learning how to be with someone unlike me. Some days, all I want is same....the comfort of not having to work at it....of knowing that if I relax for a minute, my world will not be turned on its ear.

I suppose if I knew how to navigate that, my life would be different. But, even at the ripe old age of not yet 40, I'm still learning relationship algebra.